PATIENCE AND FAITH

Everything that happens in your life is in preparation for your future. It builds your character, and strengthens your mind and your faith. When I was young I lost a boyfriend to a tragic accident, experienced a broken heart and the loss of a few good friends. I gave birth to two preemies,my firstborn weighing only two and a half pounds, and Jill weighing in at a mere one and a half pounds. I went through a bitter divorce, and later had two very rebellious teenagers. Then came Jill's accident and the aftermath that we are still dealing with to this day.You can let it wear you down, or you can let it build you up. I chose to learn from all of my tragedies, and make something good come out of it. So the letters, phone calls, and delays for Jasmine's adoption were another test of my patience and faith. You can ask anyone, I am not someone with much patience. When I want something, I am like a little kid. (ask my parents) I want it now! So the next year was a real test for me. We would send in the required papers to the state, and they would lose them. This happened so often that Jack finally started making quadruple copies of everything and hand delivered them to each department that needed them. They all knew him in Newark, so when he called them they definitely knew who he was! I was so worried that this might never happen. I was in my fifties, and what if a family member stepped forward and wanted Jasmine? She needed so much care, and I was afraid that they would take her and just put her back in long term care. We had to go through the process of having the parents' rights terminated. The father was no problem because he was in jail, and denied that he was her father. He gladly signed the papers. Her birth mother was another story. She was not willing to sign anything. We even went to Newark to meet her and her sister with a mediator present. I handed Jasmine to her, and she held her as if I had handed her any one's child. I gave her pictures of Jasmine, and told her if she would like to keep in touch with us, that I would gladly do so. Her sister said they would have to consult with the rest of the family to see if it would be an option for us to adopt her. (meanwhile, not ONE family member ever made an attempt to see her even once!) I have to admit that the next thing I did was to scare her mother a little. It was time for Jasmine's feeding so we whipped out all of her equipment to "hook her up". I told her mother she could continue to hold her while I hooked up her feeding tube, but she handed her back quickly. She said she had to leave, and she and her sister got up and left before they even said good bye. Clearly, she was not interested in caring for Jasmine. We had to wait out the time it would take for the state to revoke her rights as her mother. So that's what we did. We waited and waited, but at least we had Jasmine.